I haven't posted since September 5th which is entirely way too long. there has been a lot of reasons for that... the main one being the fact that I'm lazy. But also since September 5th a lot has happened.
When I got back from the Youth Group fall retreat I got the flu. Not the throw up flu fortunately but what I had certainly wasn't fun either. I dealt with that for about 3 or 4 days I think and then I spent another 4 or so days getting better from it. And during that time that I was getting better from the flu I developed a cold... which turned into a sinus infection. Which is what I have been dealing with for over a week now almost two. So I have been sick for about three weeks... not fun. I think part of the reason I am not getting better is stress. Not that I have a lot to do (everybody always thinks its ridiculous when I say I get stressed) but because I am not good at dealing with stress.
One thing that has been stressing me out is leading worship at my youth group. In all honesty I'm really not very good at guitar and the amount of songs I know is very very limited. Messing up is something I hate and something I fear. This is stressing me out. But why? If I had the right view about this I wouldn't be stressed out. Worship is about leading people in praising God. Not sounding good. Worship has a greater purpose than impressing people, worship is about God, for God, and with God. I don't see myself in that equation but yet I am always trying to add myself in there.
School has also been really stressing me out. In all honesty I put WAY too much pressure on myself to do good in school. My oldest brother is going to law school and my other brother is going to Butler for six years for their pharmacy program... needless to say we are going to be spending a lot of money on education. And for some reason I have put all the pressure to get scholarships on myself. And doing well in school is hard with Hon Physics and Hon Pre-Calculus. Ok let me rephrase that. Meeting my ridiculous standards for myself is hard with those classes. In all honesty when I got an A- in English class freshman year I was ticked. Like really ticked. I was mad all summer. How pathetic is that? And even know I want to do anything in my power to keep myself from getting a grade that starts with anything other than an A. But again, the only reason I am stressed is because I don't have the right viewpoint. God should be the reason I try in school. God is the reason why I get the grades I get so I should be satisfied with whatever he gives me... even if it is a B. God is going to find a way to pay for college or wherever He wants me to go whether that's a Christian college, regular college, an institute, or even an army college (which getting this stick figure body into a soldier would also take a miracle from Him haha). And whatever He wants me to study, He'll let me know eventually.
So basically I worry too much if you haven't noticed haha. Everything in life is telling me to settle down. Lecrae concert: we shouted at the top of our lungs "I don't worry about a 'thang'". Junior High Bible Study: we read about how God provides for us, our job is just to be focused on Him and also we read the verse about not worrying about tomorrow because today has enough worries of its own. Reading through the Psalms: I see how much God did for David and Israel and all they had to do is pray. Its really just amazing how God knows what you need to hear and somehow He'll make you hear it. You just have to be listening.
So thanks for reading! I hope it wasn't too boring. By the way, if you want to talk about anything or need prayer just send me an e-mail at sam.hrtng@gmail.com, text me if you have my number, or Facebook me. Also do the same if you have ideas about what I should post about. God bless!
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